Bi-weekly Time with Andrew

I like to call this special time "When I start yelling, it means they wrote it in Caps."

Pretty much everyday, I get bored answering phones. So one of my go-to websites for a little pick me up is damnyouautocorrect.com, where the proof is presented that iPhones like to make you send inappropriate messages to your parents and pastor by changing your words, like this:

HahahahahaBLURGH!

I then read approximately 5 pages of these texts, trying extremely hard not to laugh outloud. This results in shaking, crying, occasional snorts, and finally the feeling that I'm going to throw up. Right before I start heaving, I change websites to something more tame, because throwing up in public is so 7th Grade.

Okay, back-story ended.

This is what happens. Every other week or so, I'm sitting on the couch with Andrew when I suddenly remember autocorrects, how they rock my world and how Andrew avoids reading like the plague, and so wouldn't have read any lately. I turn to Andrew and say "Hey, do you want to read some damnyouautocorrects?!" He answer "Ok". His facial expression rarely matches the manic joy on mine.

I then read a few. Like these.


Jesus is always somehow funny in a DYAC





I LOVE when they just dig themselves a deeper hole.




But after about four autocorrects, long pauses appear between texts. Because I am laughing so hard. Andrew of course doesn't help me out by reading a few of his own, because that would be a nice thing to do. Instead, he just sits back and watches me have a epileptic laugh attack. Because he only agrees to listen to the autocorrects to laugh at me, not with me.

And I read some more of these and feel like throwing up again.